CHOKE CUBS CHOKE (sung to the tune Go Cubs Go)

I love baseball. Most people who know me know that. I am a WHITE SOX fan NOT a Cub fan. I did however watch most of the games the cubs played this season. It was a season that saw the flashy ass cubs do all kinds of fun things. Alfonso Sori (sorry) ano and 6 - 4 - Lee and Ramirez, DeRosa oh the names are endless, Big Z, a record number of players the cubs had at the All-Star Game: 8 of them mind you and not one of them bothered to show up for three of the most important games in the history of the franchise.

In true chicago cub fashion the hapless bastards and their mean spirited fan base made me a genius. I called it in May. I figured that there was no way in the world that the cubs would be in the World Series. They were too good for the Fall Classic. That game is reserved for winners, not flubbers.

If you detect bitterness in my writing you would be accurate. The cubs you see have let their fandom down yet again and as a fan of the 2005 WORLD CHAMPION CHICAGO WHITE SOX it pains me as well. How long must I throw this modern era WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP in the millions of faces of despondent cub fans? The only people who I feel the most microscopic nearly invisible iota of sorrow for are people like this one brother who has to be around 80 years old. He is a very nice gentleman and it would have been cool to see happiness in that mans face. His favorite team winning it all just one fucking time in his life.

Failed AGAIN.

Just so you know cub fans I can fix your team in two weeks...tear down Wrigley Field and build a new one. Stop blaming goats, black cats, Bartman, Leon Durham, aliens, Donavon McNabb's mom, Dave Chappelle's trip to Africa, the Wall Street Bailout, Sam Zell, my high school drama teacher Mrs. Czaja, Bono and anybody else you can think of. Tear down Wrigley because the joint is a bad memory...I wonder if there is a scientific term for what you cub fans go through? Man it must SUCK having to endure the same thing over and over again...wait a second I think I have a word for it albeit not a scientific term lets look at the definition:

Pronunciation:

\in-ˈsa-nə-tē\

Function:

noun

Inflected Form(s):

plural in·san·i·ties

Date:

1590

INSANITY - a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia) 2: such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility 3 a: extreme folly or unreasonableness b: something utterly foolish or unreasonable

Pick one cub fans because if you read this all the way through and you are still a fan of the Chicago Cubs after what they did to you AGAIN then you are insane.