I LOVE A PARADE

I know that this is going to upset many and among the "many" I'm speaking about friends as well but...it's time for an identity check. The 80th Bud Billiken Day Parade took place here in Chicago on Saturday and honestly - the parade embarrassed me. The sight of young women poppin' their cooter on TV was frightening at best.

If I learned nothing else from the parade I learned that a lot of black folks, more than I ever imagined have blond hair and that I believed all this time was most impossible, a lot of our kids are obese but very limber, we are easily entertained by bad entertainers, our legends are tired, we will dance all over that ass, the back to school portion of what was once a great parade has been lost.

Don't get me wrong I embrace the idea of my people getting together and showing America how we get down. I just haven't witnessed the get down part yet. Admittedly I did not attend this years parade but I watched it on TV and you know what? I didn't see one book or backpack or anything related to school. I did see SEX and plenty of it.

Earlier this week the Chicago Public Schools made the silly decision to ask the singer of the song Birthday Sex, Jeremih to be the poster boy for the Back to School effort. Not only was this so horribly planned, it carried over into this years parade and sex is still selling. With the horrendous number of deaths of school aged kids this year alone, the parade would be better suited dealing directly with that issue and toning down the potential spike in the population based on Shaquinta and her limber vagina.

I know that this makes me sound like a cat that doesn't like fun - quite the opposite I love having a good time. But what does it say about the educators and parents of these children whose hormones are flying out of control not to mention many who have suffered as a result of unwanted STD's and pregnancies. I'm saying it today: kill the parade for at least one year. Take that money to bombard the community that it surrounds with school supplies, health and wellness info and vouchers for uniforms if the school requires them. Let this 80 year old have a year of reflection so that we can be proud of what it represented for many of us for many years.

See it isn't the parade that is the problem, it's how my people act when that spotlight hits us and I feel qualified to say that we could use some "how the fuck to act in front of 25 million people" lessons. I can only hope that the many will stand in front of the few and see what I and many others are seeing. Before anybody gets all messed up in the head - I am from the "hood" and I converse with these young folks daily. I will pass my thoughts on to them and listen to their opinion and I already know that they won't like what I am saying to them.

But I can't look at Shaquinta and her cooter on TV anymore...thank God the parade doesn't include a pole. The Chicken and Hennessy Parade is not a good look...